Just pondering here

One of the reasons I like to visit Notary Café it’s because it’s one of the few places I know of I may glean from great minds, listen to exciting experiences in the field and all that while catching up with a fellow notary with whom I had recently made friends with and you can escape finding along the way new notaries who are hungry to succeed and ready to learn from their senior peers.

But half the time, during my virtual visit, I can’t help but feel so distressed and disappointed. I guess even in a field lilies and roses you’ll find yourself accidentally stepping on dog piles; it’s next to impossible not to come across someone’s incendiary, finger-pointing comments from some disgruntle, seasoned notary with their typical passive-aggressive comments hurled at SS companies or at fellow notaries-especially at newbies all because 'they are stealing from them with low-ball job offers or because someone is taking those low paying jobs making the industry members look desperate." It’s so enraging.

I promised myself I wouldn’t waste (again) by reacting to some rancid comment individually. I did that once already and all got was my post being removed and I must admit I wasn’t cordial at all. So instead I’d like to break it down into a stand-alone blog/conversion-like approach where I will refer to the groups rather than individuals. Currently there are two groups co-existing and interacting in this platform and it is them whom I want address directly. My goal, I hope, is to be of encouragement especially to group one; and for group two, the one that concern me the most, I hope my words come across as a call to humility while there’s a chance.

I have a fascination with group one: these are the newbies-the hungry ones. The ones who want to take over the world. They’ve come a long way to be where they are today. They are the embodiment of entrepreneurship, boldness, risk, and excitement. They have the knowledge but lack experience. They got the drive yet lack mentorship. It’s all good though. To them I say: to the wind with what others say of you. NO ONE IS YOUR COMPETITION BUT YOURSELF. If you must compare yourself to someone then do it with the person in the mirror. Many of you were sold on the idea you can become financially prosperous or become a six-nay -seven figure income notary; I don’t deny it can happen however to them I say let this be your controlling thought: It won’t happen over-night but you can get there with hard work, patience, and lots perseverance; those are very things you all already are masters at. But you desperately need mentorship, preferably from a good reliable source like a good, seasoned notary who knows the ropes (they are as rare as unicorns but they do exist) they are the ones who will keep you grounded. Lastly, never let your guard down because you are not immune to become like those in the other group.

I wish I could say the same good things for those in group two: I know is not all of you but the great majority are. These are the one who in one sentence have put their careers in auto-pilot. Those in this group were once in the former group but somehow, somewhere along the way lost their shine and got too comfortable. To their credit, I will recognize that they are knowledgeable of the ins and the out and in-betweens on the industry. They’ve been around for a while. They are the professors, the deans and researchers of the notary industry. But just like many scholars, they have become way too comfy in their tenure and seat smug in their high ivory towers with prideful eyes because they think no one else will ever come close to their level of expertise and experience; hence they’ve become cynical, passive-aggressive, thin-skinned, easily offended, unteachable, mean, entitled, rude, see others as competition, skeptical of progress, excel at find fault in everything and everyone rather than looking inward, always disdaining new others, fail to adapt and improvise due to changes in the industry, complainers of their clients, envious and (this is the one is most bothersome to me) they only see their careers as a 9-5 job rather than as a business and it is because of that mindset that they become all the things that were listed. (With this I close and thank you for sticking with me this far). If this describe any of you, or feel you have fallen through the cracks let me tell you there’s hope for you: it begins with humility and repentance; repentance is acknowledging that you have been lead by wrong ideas and start doing the opposite and rectify your wrongs. While there’s time do it for your own’s sake, your families’, your fellow notaries’ and the industry’s.

Both groups can learn from each other and together help make our industry a respectable and honorable one.


This is very well said and very well spoken, and if I’m “reading between the lines” correctly, drafted very carefully at that, and for the reasons you stated in your post, and that is trying to get a message across while respecting ones “feelings.” We all have these “feelings,” and they should duly be respected. In my experience, most who make their feelings known do so based on what they WANT, not what is necessarily TRUE or REALITY! I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: New notaries are like busses. There’s always another one coming. Collaboration and respect among us all is the key to not only our success, but to achieve what we “want” from this industry. Drawing a line in the sand between the two groups causes just that, and that’s division, leaving no incentive for one group to help the other out. New notaries have just as much to bring to the table as the seasoned ones do, but if we don’t solicit that info from one another, we will never know, nor should we complain.
On the flip side, a no BS post/reply is meant to put feelings aside to get to the “meat and potato’s” of an issue/concern, simply because the message is delivered differently, or what I call, “to the point.” It is the language in a post that not only defines the authors intention, but solicitates the readers interpretation. My point? Just because it’s something one doesn’t want to hear, it doesn’t mean its not true or realistic/rational message. And a lot of the time, trying to deliver your message while respecting ones feelings, creates a fog, ultimately resulting in the author not getting their point across for a meaningful, realist, rational response. I guess my question is, when someone is hell bent on not listening or considering anything outside of what they want to hear, how do you get them to consider “the other side” while respecting their feelings?

Please Note - I am locking this topic for a couple of reasons. Replies to this post are going to end up turning into arguments about “who is right and who is wrong.” I believe the sentiment here is intended to be helpful - which is why I am not deleting it entirely, just stopping future replies from turning angry.

I somewhat disagree with the “2 groups” labels, even though I understand where it comes from. Trust me, angry emails come from experienced Notaries as well as new ones about the conversations that occur here. My personal belief is that as internet arguments are becoming more and more commonplace, many people view them as entertainment. NOTARY CAFE IS NOT A GENERAL PURPOSE SOCIAL MEDIA SITE AND WE DO NOT CONDONE PERSONAL ATTACKS OR BULLYING TACTICS FOR ANY REASON.

Whenever moderation is required, somebody walks away with hurt feelings. If the discussions here remain business focused and helpful - everyone wins. However, we have seen too much hostility and anger recently for my liking, even though many posts on our forums do contain useful and encouraging information. I believe @gabrielnaranjo40 's message is sincere - users should not have to worry about whether their post is going to be ridiculed or slighted. New users do have the right to ask questions. I also understand that to experienced users, many of these questions are redundant. My goal is to find a way to encourage everyone to coexist and help each other.

Mike @ Notary Cafe Support