Ok, this one might only be funny if you’re familiar with Southern California, but there’s also Google Maps if you really want to get the joke.
I got a call from my favorite little signing service today. The only one I’ll work with anymore. He says, “So I got a call from Escrow today…I’m going to tell you what they said they need, but I already know what your answer is going to be. But I have to be able to tell them I called my people.” And then he laughed, and this is the signing request that followed:
(First of all, you need to know I’m in Oceanside, CA)
Split purchase signing. First signer in San Clemente (I’ve gone to this location for them once before, for an increased fee). Second signer in SANTA MONICA. Immediately after signing, please return docs to office in city of Orange.
Here are the kickers: It was 10am when he called me, and docs were not ready yet. And they wanted this all done BEFORE CLOSE OF BUSINESS TODAY because they need to close TODAY.
Oh, and also, they would “like to keep costs down, so they hope this doesn’t cost too much extra.”
I laughed. He laughed. I said, “Ok, well, that’s all just flat out IMPOSSIBLE. Please call them back and tell them that all your notaries laughed at you when you presented this assignment, because there’s no way this can be done.” Then I joked, “They’d have to pay me helicopter rental fees, dude.” (Yes, Mr. signing service guy and I are on “dude” terms with each other. LOL!)
My husband said, after I hung up, I should have said yes, for $500, and then when I was sitting in traffic and didn’t make it before closing, enjoy the fact that someone had to sit in their office and wait for me.
Sure, I drive a Mustang GT, and oft-times I drive it like I stole it. LOL! But no way I’m breaking my a$$ driving 150 miles and giving up an ENTIRE DAY of earning potential for them to throw pennies at me. I just hope some poor schmuck didn’t take this assignment for $75 “because I’m new and need the experience.”