This is a long story, but I wrote it right after this experience. Hope you enjoy!
Just Another Day at the Office:
The day started pretty well. It was a beautiful morning drive through the country on my way to my first appointment. I arrived on time. I walked up to a modest home with horses out back and a beautiful array of late summer flowers. I was met at the door by a lovely lady, probably 70 years of age or so. I said “Hello, I’m Kathleen.” She said, “Come on in.” So I followed her through the house to the kitchen. There I saw an equally charming gentleman. I said, “Hi I’m Kathleen and you must be Larry.” His wife said, “No this is Tony.” I looked at each of them and said, “Ummm . . . . I think I’m at the wrong house ( the house number had been partially covered up making it difficult to see).” Sure enough . . . I was at the wrong place. They were so gracious! They told me they had both had health issues and visiting nurses etc, had been coming on a regular basis. She said, “You looked like you knew what you were doing so I just let you in!” We laughed. I told them who I was looking for and they told me they were neighbors across the street. So, we say our good-byes and well wishes and I leave.
I make my way across the street to my REAL appointment.
Upon arrival at the average looking ranch type home, I’m greeted at the door by a lady who never said a word but escorted me through the small foyer into the living room where I finally met Larry.
Now let me transgress here for a moment. Does anyone remember Lurch? The Adams family butler? I have to say the mysterious woman who greeted me, reminded me a great deal of him. She was not dressed as well, but she had definitely done a very good job of shaving that morning. Once I came face to face with Larry, she disappeared, who knows where.
There were other people in the home. Larry led me to the kitchen table, asked if I would like a bottle of water (to which I replied, “No, Thank You”), and apologized for all the clutter in the house. It seems that 2 weeks before, his stepson and his wife showed up on their doorstep wanting to stay for a little while with their 7 children and a pit bull.
Larry’s wife Annette is an invalid and housebound. It’s difficult for her to get out of bed. (So, I knew “Lurch” was not his wife.) As we started the signing, I asked for I.D.'s There would be 3 signers: Larry, Annette, and Pierre (Annette’s son). I’m told that Annette is not really his wife, not legally anyway, but common law. For that reason she would only be signing 4 documents, as would her son, Pierre (he needed to be put on the deed because of some business deal he was getting into).
I collected ID from Larry and Pierre. Annette could not find hers and had no idea where it was. So, as I continued the signing of the documents only Larry had to sign, the entire household was looking everywhere for the ID. They kept coming to ask Larry where this was and where that was until I finally said, “Why don’t we stop and you can go help find it.” That’s what we did. In the mean time while they spent the next 30 to 45 minutes looking, The “lady/Lurch” mysteriously floated through the room, coming from where I don’t know and disappearing to where, have no idea. The only thing that keeps coming to mind is the song “They’re creepy and they’re kookie, mysterious and spooky . . . .” You get the idea.
In the middle of all this, the pit bull got sick. So a lot of cleaning up took place in between the search for the ID. Pierre came through the room and asked if I would like a bottle of water. I said, “Yes, please!”
By this time, after 2 cups of coffee for breakfast and a bottle of water in the car on the way there, I really needed to use the restroom . . . however, I was scared to death of what I might find in there! I decided I could hold it.
They finally found an expired driver’s license for Annette. In my state I can legally notarize documents without ID as long as there a at least 2 adults present who will attest to the persons identity. I knew I would be OK with that, but that title would not accept it. So I get on the phone to title, explain the situation. They agree to the expired license, and we moved on.
Larry is a retired vet and wanted to keep telling me stories of his adventures. So, in between stories, the Lurch lady, and signing docs, the step son’s wife and several children were in the living room (adjacent to the kitchen where we were) the children were quietly sitting but “mom” decided to start dancing to music playing in her ear buds. Now, I don’t mean just moving a bit, I mean DANCING! Meanwhile, the second pit bull threw up and Lurch floated through the room again.
Finally completing the signing, I gathered my things and fled the scene.
Problem . . . I still have to go to the bathroom and I’m 45 minutes from home. I am out in the country with few options. I come to a gas station with a Quik Stop type store. Surely they have a restroom. Wrong! No public restroom. Back in the car I go, and travel several miles to a very small town. Stopped at 2 more gas stations before finding relief.
A day to remember . . . . and a story told many times. I still laugh as I think about it.